Stay Open In The Pain

Our spiritual work is to grow more connected to others around us. Our obstacle to building bridges to other people is stored hurt. Perceived or real… When we don’t resolve conflicts in our relationships, our lives can’t move forward.

Today, tell your boyfriend or boss or brother exactly what you want, what you feel, what you think. You are going to worry about what they will say or think. And honestly, that’s the work. Just expose yourself and be vulnerable. Ask the Light to give you the strength to stay open in the pain.

Your soul will love you for having the courage to speak up.

You see, pain is inevitable in life. No matter where or when you were born, your financial situation, your family situation, whether you are fat or thin, sick or healthy, loved or despised… pain is inevitable.

Mind you, suffering is optional… and while it is true, this is not what this blogpost is about.

You see, I just hung up on skype with a friend of mine from Architecture School, Panni. We went to architecture school together is Budapest, and we got reunited about 3-4 years ago. We now speak once or twice a week on skype, with camera. It is the most intimate media every, it is like we are sitting at her kitchen table and drink tea or coffee and talk.

Yet, it has taken this long to allow each other a glimpse into our pain.

Panni’s older son is a very talented guy… except that he never graduated from college… he went and started his own business. He bought a condo, planned to rebuild it… never finished it. Except that he married a compulsive liar and now he has two children. After hiding for a few years, he met another woman… she is like a kid sister to his wife.

Panni hopes that this new woman will be different and will help her son to become a whole and complete person who can and will finish what he starts.

Panni does not understand that we MUST repeat the same situation until we learn our lesson, until we make the correction that situation came our way the first place.

Panni, and billions of others don’t understand that life is not that empty and meaningless as it looks. That the game, we call Life, has rules, and there is no cheating.

Panni’s son needs to learn to stay open in the pain, face it like an adult, express his feelings, and be done with it. Instead he harbors it, suppresses it, and then he needs to repeat the cause of the pain. That is how it works.

You have the power.

2 Replies to “Stay Open In The Pain”

  1. A little addon:
    In Landmark Education they used to say: “Be With The Pain”
    Unfortunately that sentence can be said in two ways: 1. Be, with the pain, 2. Be-with the pain.

    The first one means: when you allow the pain to be, then you don’t disconnect from Source, you don’t lose your power. When you allow the pain to be, you don’t assign it significance (ego) and therefore you can deal with it, and move on with your life. On the other hand, if you decide that the pain is significant, in means something, then you must run away, withdraw, or react in trillions of different ways, with means you are stuck with it, and your life is stuck. But the biggest price you pay is that you just disconnected from the Light… and every area of your life suffers, your health, your relationships, your money, you joy, your school, your spiritual growth… everything. Don’t do it. It’s not worth it.

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