Many of us don’t bother to ask for more, or to challenge our status quo, or to dream bigger because we don’t feel like we deserve it. We feel, at the core, that we are “wrong.”

When we feel “wrong” in speaking up or fulfilling a deep need, it’s because we are getting in touch with something that wasn’t accepted in us when we were younger, or in a past life. For example, when people who weren’t allowed to feel joy start feeling joy, it confuses them, and even makes them uncomfortable. That’s why we sabotage ourselves.

Today, get in touch with what feels wrong to you. Give yourself permission to feel right.

Another aspect of this “being wrong” or “being the wrong one” is that we put everyone’s need before ours.

I developed that characteristic over time.

Just a week ago I had two cats that I spent more money on their food than my own, spent more time worrying about their well-being than mine.

One cat, an abandoned male cat was especially at the receiving end of my “selfless giving kindness.”

He showed his gratitude by using my apartment as a big litter box. I now have 5 litter boxes, but he still preferred the area behind my computers. I guess he wanted me to think of him when I work.

This past Sunday I had this thought that maybe I, and my well being is more important than keeping this cat in.

I threw him out. I cried all day. I was sure everyone will say that I was a heartless person. But all my friends celebrated my courage to disrupt this “martyr-like” behavior.

It’s been four days. I am at peace. I am enjoying my house. I enjoy time with my other cat. I eat undisturbed, I can keep the door closed, and I can sleep till 7 am without a cat waking me to take him out to pee.

Am I heartless? Maybe. But I definitely crossed some barrier with regards to my self-worth. Let’s see where it takes me.

Please add your two cents worth… (or a dollar?)

Our spiritual work is to grow more connected to others around us. Our obstacle is stored hurt. When we don’t resolve conflicts in our relationships, our lives can’t move forward.

Today, tell your boyfriend or boss or brother exactly what you want, what you feel, what you think. You are going to worry about what they will say or think. And honestly, that’s the work. Just expose yourself and be vulnerable. Ask the Light to give you the strength to stay open in the pain.

Your soul will love you for having the courage to speak up.

You see, pain is inevitable in life. No matter where or when you were born, your financial situation, your family situation, whether you are fat or thin, sick or healthy, loved or despised… pain is inevitable.

Mind you, suffering is optional… and while it is true, this is not what this blogpost is about.

You see, I just hung up on skype with a friend of mine, Panni. We went to architecture shool together is Budapest, and we got reunited about 3-4 years ago. We now speak once or twice a week on skype, with camera. It is the most intimate media every, it is like we are sitting at her kitchen table and drink tea or coffee and talk.

Yet, it has taken this long to allow each other a glimpse into our pain.

Panni’s older son is a very talented guy… except that he never graduated from college… he went and started his own business. He bought a condo, planned to rebuild it… never finished it. Except that he married a compulsive liar and now he has two children. After hiding for a few years, he met another woman… she is like a kid sister to his wife.

Panni hopes that this new woman will be different and will help her son to become a whole and complete person who can and will finish what he starts.

Panni does not understand that we MUST repeat the same situation until we learn our lesson, until we make the correction that situation came our way the first place.

Panni, and billions of others don’t understand that life is not that empty and meaningless as it looks. That the game, we call Life, has rules, and there is no cheating.

Panni’s son needs to learn to stay open in the pain, face it like an adult, express his feelings, and be done with it. Instead he harbors it, supresses it, and then he needs to repeat the cause of the pain. That is how it works.

You have the power.