I had been hesitant: it must be just another scam to get my money. But finally I gave in, and bought it. It’s $42 a month.

There are daily lectures and the experience is phenomenal. I have experienced an immersion like never before.

I have learned stuff I didn’t even know I should ask, even though it was about something I experienced.

For example I have been, from time to time, experiencing extreme anxiety, pressure, restlessness, almost a physical pain. It has nothing to do with what ‘s going on in my life, it has nothing to do with my health, obviously it is something non-physical. I decided that it was a good thing, but had no good explanation, why it would be a good thing.

I found out that the Light always wants to give you more than you want to receive. That creates a lack of vessel to receive the light. The pressure is an indication of that.

So what do I normally do when this happens? I play computer games, talk incessantly on the phone, all “satan” stuff, not in the right direction. OK? So what should I do to grow a vessel big enough to receive all the light that is coming to me?

I don’t quite have an answer, but one thing is sure: deflecting the light isn’t going to grow my vessel…

Or you take a little pill, and you wake up beautiful, slim, sexy, and rich.
Or you pray that God gives you a miracle
Or you meditate
Or you buy that get-rich-quick scheme that promises overnight money with no work at all
Or you play it over and over in the theater of your mind… You feel it… you appreciate everything… still…

But all these don’t cause a miracle.

No matter how skillfully you wave the wand, or how fancy (and expensive) the little pill is, how passionately you pray… etc. etc. etc.

No. none of them work. Sometimes, just so you get more confused, it seems to be working.
Or it seems to be working for others. Typically people you see on TV, or who write books you buy, or you pay to listen to. One in a million, or two, three, four million?

So what is wrong with this picture? Why are we filling our minds with such nonsense, stuff that doesn’t work?

I have an answer for you that you won’t like: because believing in someone else making miracles for you allows you to stay the same.

Because for the ego, changing is the hardest.

And because what causes miracles is going to involve changing. Giving up what the ego is interested.

And at tha price the ego would rather that you don’t have miracles.

I just finished reading the book “God doesn’t make miracles, you do.” by Yehuda Berg.

Obviously I like Yehuda Berg. He seems to be living and breathing what he writes and speaks about. and obviously he is doing the work.

So I had this dilemma. Shall I just copy my favorite paragraphs from the book, and be done with this article?

If I did that, I would be like the thousands and tens of thousands of people who pout other people’s words, because they don’t have anything their own to say. Nor the experience.

That is not my way.

Back in 1991 November, I formulated the purpose of my life, probably channeled it, with the following words: “Living on the edge, generating distinctions of transformation for humankind.”

I am just starting to get what the heck I meant. Really, I just got something important about that today.

You see, I used to think (and I had 17 years to think about it) that living on the edge was an outside thing… like a circumstance. Like getting poor, or in trouble, or sick, or being evicted… and I manifested all those circumstances in my life.

What I got today that going to those edges is quite useless for humankind, but was very useful for my ego. It was all about me, my life, my troubles, me distinguishing, my gift to humankind.

It never “bought me” anything. Not even a tiny miracle. Bummer.

The past few months on the other hand, (there were quite a few turning points, or cross roads, significant defining moments) mostly quite insignificant in this very moment.

What is significant is that I finally married Landmark and Kabbalah, and have been consciously, greedily generating miracles. Not big ones. It seems that kaizen is my signature style… small steps, small changes.

Back in 2000, one night I was particularly bothered by something, and asked for coaching from a Landmark Center Manager.

She said something quite whimsical: “You think that it’s a bowl of wax, but in fact it is a ball of yarn.”

That arrested me in my tirade of martyrdom.

“What on earth does that mean?” I demanded to know. “You’ll figure it out…” the center manager said, and left the room.

I have figured it out.

If a bowl of wax blocked your way to happiness, you would have to melt the whole darn bowlful to get rid of the wax (your roadblock). But if it is a ball of yarn that’s blocking your way, you can snip away little threads of the yarn, and soon enough the whole ball becomes cushy, and give way.

And so is the way of transformation.

Most of us are waiting for the magic bullet, while continuing doing what we have always done… but some of us are snipping away diligently at the ball of yarn… and transform our life, our business, our health.

That is the way of the kabbalah.