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How to defeat your ego
Rav Ashlag, the founder of The Kabbalah Centre, says there is only one thing we can do to defeat our ego – recognize it. The moment we see it, the Light comes in and sucks it out of us. When we give up our ego completely, when we achieve the level where we can do true letting go of our agenda, that’s immortality in all parts of our life.
Today, recognize everything about you that is opposite of the Light, and connect it to your ego. Whatever hurts you, whatever ticks you off, whatever saddens you, whatever insults you, whatever worries you, whatever frightens you, know that it’s simply your ego doing its job of blocking your Light.
The vessel, friction, surrounding light revealed
There is a new source for Kabbalah learning, Kabbalah University.
I had been hesitant: it must be just another scam to get my money. But finally I gave in, and bought it. It’s $42 a month.
There are daily lectures and the experience is phenomenal. I have experienced an immersion like never before.
I have learned stuff I didn’t even know I should ask, even though it was about something I experienced.
For example I have been, from time to time, experiencing extreme anxiety, pressure, restlessness, almost a physical pain. It has nothing to do with what ‘s going on in my life, it has nothing to do with my health, obviously it is something non-physical. I decided that it was a good thing, but had no good explanation, why it would be a good thing.
I found out that the Light always wants to give you more than you want to receive. That creates a lack of vessel to receive the light. The pressure is an indication of that.
So what do I normally do when this happens? I play computer games, talk incessantly on the phone, all “satan” stuff, not in the right direction. OK? So what should I do to grow a vessel big enough to receive all the light that is coming to me?
I don’t quite have an answer, but one thing is sure: deflecting the light isn’t going to grow my vessel…
Satan? Ego? Useful or Faulty Design?
I have been observing myself as a spiritual practice. Trying to “remember myself” as Gurdjieff would say it, call upon the “witness” or “observer”. Be awake. Either way, I have noticed something remarkable about myself: see if you can relate.
When I am in front of my computer* (where I spend most of my day) and I encounter something that requires the slightest push on my end, I see myself automatically going to the computer game of my choice, freecell.
I began observing this phenomenon about 6 months ago (it was there, unobserved, for many years). But 4 days ago I decided to employ “restriction,” which is one of Kabbalah’s main tenets, and see what will happen.
For about 36 hours I closed the freecell program as soon as I opened it. Then every time I was “awake” which means I was by myself and I was still observing myself. On the other hand, every time I was on the phone, or watching a video on my computer, or listening to an audio file, my attention wasn’t on myself, and I played… until I “woke up.”
Still curious, more interested in the experiment than conquering the force that moves my hand, I saw something today that is worth sharing.
Since I have started this blog, I have been watching how I somehow leak the energy that is necessary for creative thinking and expression… by talking on the phone, by playing freecell.
Every occasion when I need the little push and I opt to play instead, two things happen: 1. I have diminished the internal discomfort 2. I have successfully diverted my attention from what is important to me.
The first one is good, right? Who would want to be uncomfortable, after all. Continue reading “Satan? Ego? Useful or Faulty Design?”